A big dick in space

“It’s nice to meet you, Jon.” Their arms finally unlocked and they looked at each other again. “And my A.I. calls me Captain Walker V, why don’t you call me Vivian or Viv,” the captain chuckled. Jon nodded with a goofy grin.

“Well, thank you, Vivian! I can’t believe I’m going home. Never thought I’d find my way there again,” he said.

Vivian’s expression darkened. She debated in her overworked brain whether to tell him now or later. It wouldn’t get any easier, she told herself. “About that…” she said regretfully, “the ship’s hyperdrive busted a little over two months ago. Unfortunately, I don’t actually have the parts to fix it.”

Jon’s brow furrowed. “My pod wouldn’t let me, but can’t you get a message out? How far out are we?”

“Out of range. Most ships weren’t designed to go this far. We’re about sixty-two billion milars from the nearest colonized planet or manned space station. Without a working hyperdrive, I can do about seven yardzillions a day,” she answered dejectedly.

“But…” Jon tried to figure it out, “that doesn’t work. That means we won’t hit land for like-“